Update..

On Saturday morning little Carter passed away. There was such a peacful feeling in the NICU as we sat there and held this little angel. We all knew that he had fought a good fight and was now back in his loving Heavenly Fathers arms. Little Tori is still continuing to fight. Today they took her off all of the medication and she was doing a lot better. The new doctor has hope that this little baby will live. They all decided that the best option would be to Life Flight her to Primary Childrens hospital to repair the hole in her heart. The doctor said that repairing the hole would make her fight easier and the swelling and blood on her brain will go down. We are all continuing to pray and have hope that this little angel will make it!

Gratitude

grat·i·tude (grăt'ĭ-tūd', -tyūd') n.

The state of being grateful; thankfulness.

This has been such a crazy week. On Wednesday my cousin had her babies at 24 weeks. They are so tiny. They are not expected to make it through the weekend. They are only 12 inches long and only weigh 1 pound 5 ounces. Seeing those little babies in the NICU broke my heart.



Seeing how much these little babies mean to me and my family helped put so many things into perspective for me. I realized how grateful I am for eternal families. I am grateful that my parents have made those covenants so we can be an eternal family. I am grateful for the priesthood and that those babies were able to get a name and a blessing. I am grateful for my family and for the strength and support that they show. I am grateful for the doctors and nurses for all there hard work. I am most grateful for my Heavenly Father and his greater plan for those babies.

I know that if those babies do not make it through the weekend that there are many lessons to learn. That they were able to help us understand that there is really a bigger plan in store for them, and that we need to have complete trust in the Lord. I am grateful that I will be able to one day see those babies again.

Please keep them in your prayers!

New Chapter...New Book

I found out on Friday that a certain someone had entered the MTC. I was honestly really happy to hear that. I was glad that he had overcome his trial and was able to go. Now in learning about this, I decided that I would email his mom and maybe try and gain some closure from this whole thing. It has been 8 months since I last had talked to her and I didnt have any idea what she was going to say. I didnt know if he had told her I was this horrible person, I didnt know what she thought about me. What did I have to lose though? Nothing! I emailed her and was really nervous to she what she was going to say back. Everything was really nice and from her kind words, I can honestly say that I feel ok about the whole thing. I know longer have to wonder about what happened to him.

I really feel that I have gained some closure on this whole thing. I dont need to hold onto the past any longer. He was really a great guy, I had lots of fun with him, and really enjoyed his family. I can now turn that chapter in my book and look forward to the new ones that are to come!

Random Thoughts..

Life is crazy. I really feel like I need to slow down. I feel like if I am always going that I accomplish a lot more. I always have to be doing something or else it will result in me wanting to do nothing at all. If my mind isn't occupied than I think to much about things I would like to forget. Why is the past so hard to forget. I used to be really good at letting things go. Just brushing them off and forgetting that they even happened. Lately every little thing has come back to haunt me, to remind me, not letting me forget. I want to be careless, carefree, and free willing like I used to be. They just cannot escape.

What do you think would happen if everyone in the world just disappeared so that they did not have to face their wrong doings? Do you think that everyone would just eventually become numb from being hurt? Would anyone really even care? Maybe that is what makes some people different than others. They are willing to face that they were wrong and actually stand up for what they did.

I guess I just need to realize that almost everyone is different that it.

Do you run away from things?

Do you have a hard time trusting?

What is holding you back from becoming who would like to be?